When I was 21, I transferred from a junior college to a university. I met a guy the summer before school started. He lived in the town where I was going to go to school, so we started seeing each other. He already had two kids and was still somewhat involved with his youngest daughter’s mom. Yes I know, I was stupid.
I found out I was pregnant the week of finals. When I told my parents, they told me to come home after finals and we would talk. Our “talk” ended up being them telling me that I was going to place the baby for adoption. At that point, adoption hadn’t even crossed my mind. I knew I wasn’t going to have an abortion, so I thought the only other choice would be to keep my baby. My parents also informed me that they didn’t want any of the family to know, so they wanted to find a place to ship me off to for the nine months.
They found the Light House in Kansas City, Missouri. The Light House is a place where unwed pregnant girls can live for any amount of time during their pregnancy. Girls who stay there can either place or keep their babies. While I was at the Light House, they allowed me to work part-time. I got a job at the Church of the Nazarene Headquarters. The people there gave me the love and support I should have been getting from my family. I got hooked up with Pokies the adoption counselor at the Light House. We met every week and discussed all my options. She really helped me put things in perspective.
I eventually decided for myself that adoption was the right thing to do for me and my son. I found a family that I absolutely love! They had adopted three mixed kids, two girls and one boy. I thought Daniel would make a perfect addition to their family, making it two girls and two boys. Daniel was born on August 20, 1999. There were complications during labor so he was taken out by c-section. He spent the first 2 days in the infant care nursery. He was hooked up to all kinds of wires so I couldn’t really hold him. I finally got to hold him for a couple hours the last day we were at the hospital. I said my good-byes and left. I have a semi-open adoption so I keep in contact with him through letters and pictures.
Now, I’m 26 and still living in Kansas City. After I had Daniel, the Nazarene Headquarters offered me a full-time job and I gladly took it. In the next year or so, I’m going to go back to school and finish my degree. I still think about Daniel and miss him a lot. His birthday and Mother’s day are still really hard for me, but each year gets a little better. It helps a lot to know that he’s in a good Christian home with loving parents and siblings.